What do Haiti, Madelyn Grace, and King Uzziah all have in common?

This a bloggified version of a note I posted on Facebook last year around the date of our daughter's departure...

This past Monday, my wife and I were in remembrance of the loss of our daughter, Madelyn Grace, 2 years ago. For those do not know me as personally or those who I’ve just recently re-established contact with, I will fill you with details of what this is about before I get to the things I’ve learned. My wife and I were married in April 2006, and shortly after that (about 3 months) we found out that my wife was pregnant. This was very exciting news, and 10 months (almost to the day) from our wedding, my wife gave birth to a son who was as healthy as could be and we named him Caleb. About three months after this, we found out again that my wife was pregnant. This was exciting news, and we found out that this baby was a girl around the sixth month of her pregnancy. This was exciting too, since this would be our first daughter. The next month, my wife went to her monthly appointment while I was at work. Late in the morning, I got a phone call, which is unusual for me since I don’t normally get calls at work. The call I got was from my wife, and it was the most disturbing news that I could’ve heard: My wife sobbing, “She’s dead! She’s Dead! They can’t find her heartbeat!” all while I’m apart from her at work. When I arrived at the doctor’s office, the doctor informed us that our daughter had been dead for about a week before the appointment, and my wife would have to deliver the baby the next day since she was already in her seventh month of pregnancy. This was possibly the worst bit of news, considering the delivery process is supposed to be the most exciting part of the pregnancy—because you get the fruit of seeing your baby take its first breath, and hearing the baby’s first cry. This is supposed to be how it goes—it’s not supposed to end in delivering a dead child! It’s not supposed to end in mourning, it’s supposed to end, if anything, in tears of joy! Death is not supposed to occur before life outside the womb begins—not to me, at least! Not to my wife; she’s a good mother, why would this kind of thing happen to her?

This was the hardest and most trying event in our lives, but it was also the event from which we have both learned so much. The greatest lesson that I have been taught through this event has been the Sovereignty of God. The Sovereignty of God has been the most comforting aspect of all. Of course, I understood the sovereignty of God somewhat before this tragedy occurred, but that only made it more confusing to me why we were going through this. The questions came like this: If God is in control, why would God allow this? If God is in control, why am I hurting? If God is in control, why is my baby dead? That was the hardest thing to come to grips with—WHY? Throughout the past two years, however, the “Why” has become the greatest opportunity for growth in hope. As I have grappled with the “why” of my daughter’s death, and I have grasped after learning the “why” through a study of God’s Word, I have come to know more about Him, and that has been what has been most comforting. The better you know the God of the Bible, the better you can understand the “why” aspect of suffering. Now, I can’t tell you that there, on Page 243, that God said, “Geary, this is the reason that you lost your daughter”. No, but in principle, I have learned that God is not only Sovereign, but that He is Good (even though I am not), and He is Just (even when I am not), and He is Loving (even if I am not), and He is Faithful (even when I am not). This is the most comforting thing, and the aspect that brings hope from the tragedy: to know that God not only knows about this suffering, but that He allowed it for who knows how many reasons! My wife and I have already seen good and positive fruits come from this bitter event, and we are only 2 years down the road (the best fruit so far probably being our daughter Emma who we found out my wife was pregnant with one month before Madelyn was due). Who knows how God will use this to bless others who are struggling in the same circumstances or any number of other various situations?

I meant to write this on Monday, but I ran out of time and energy and didn’t get to write it out. However, it now appears that I can apply this whole aspect of God to the events of this past Tuesday as well. In Isaiah 6, Isaiah speaks of the death of King Uzziah. King Uzziah (also known as Azariah) reigned over the land of Judah for fifty-two years. That probably would have put a slight bit of a secure feeling over the people of Judah to have a king who reigned for so long in their otherwise turbulent political system. So, his death would have caused major uncertainty and unrest among the people as they watched to see who would fight for the throne, or whether his son would be a Godly man or not. But Isaiah says, “In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple. 2 Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. 3 And they were calling to one another: "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory." 4 At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.” I think it is great to notice God’s position in this whole scene: seated on the throne. He was not on the edge of His seat, biting His nails, hoping everything would turn out ok. No, He was seated on His throne the entire time, and Revelation 4 makes it sound like that is what is constantly happening. This is not to say that God is off somewhere else, not caring what happens here, but that is to say that when “bad things” happen, it does not shock God. He doesn’t need a shoulder to cry on when a tragedy happens—He’s God! Despite whatever tragic event happens, God is not surprised by it; and this fact should be comforting, because we also know that God is Loving, Gracious, and Kind to His children.

So, what should our response be to this kind of tragedy in Haiti then? Well, first of all, the focus should not be as much on the “Why” but on the “What.” God will deal with the “Why” in time, and it will become visible the farther out we get “Why” this thing happened. But “What” is a question that can be answered immediately, as in “What can we learn from this kind of tragedy (or any tragedy—personal or global)?” Well, one thing we learn is that we are NOT in control. There are a thousand “what ifs” which prove that. We cannot control weather, we cannot control life and death, we cannot control ANYTHING completely. That should lead us to ask ourselves who then is in control. As I’ve labored to point out, God is in control. Another lesson that we can learn comes directly from the Bible itself. In Luke 13, Jesus’ disciples asked him something very similar to the “Why” question we ask: “1There were some present at that very time who told him about the Galileans whose blood Pilate had mingled with their sacrifices. 2And he answered them, ‘Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans, because they suffered in this way? 3No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish. 4Or those eighteen on whom the tower in Siloam fell and killed them: do you think that they were worse offenders than all the others who lived in Jerusalem? 5No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish.’” So, maybe He is showing us that we have a need to repent. These Tahitian people were no worse sinners than I am, and yet they have had this horrible earthquake destroy their lives in front of them. This isn’t to say that God will cause only “sinners” to go through bad things until they repent, but this is a reminder: You don’t know what amount of time you have here on earth, and you don’t know what God will allow to end your life, so you should make sure that you have been reconciled to Him TODAY before you “likewise perish.” One final lesson that we can learn from this thing immediately is that this is not a pointless, senseless tragedy. Romans 8:28 says that “we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” So, why is God allowing these horrendous tragedies? Ultimately, for His glory and our good. Where is God in all of these tragic circumstances? God is at work, doing a million different things to ensure that these things work out according to His plans. God will use this tragedy to accomplish many, many good things which may not even be thinkable right now.

Who knows, in 50 years, what we will be saying couldn’t have happened without this earthquake occurring?

Who knows, in 50 years, what my wife and I will be saying wouldn’t have happened without the death of our daughter?

And who knows, in 50 years, what kind of good God will bring from the tragic circumstances of those who have trusted in Him for salvation?

Thanks for reading this (if you made it all the way through…) and I hope this is encouraging to someone out there.